It's time we part....

All good things do come to an end i guess. What started out as a good working relationship, is now turning bad. Work standards are dropping, attitude is changing, the black face is showing up more often....you get the picture. I think its time to say good bye before things get worse. Looking at the situation now, I may have to accelerate my plan. I don't want to get more worked up, I don't want to risk Isabelle under her care further, I don't want to think what else may go wrong or end up being spoilt/destroyed in this house. It's tough enough juggling work stress, I don't want to have to manage home stress.

The events which triggered it all

1) She locks herself in the room with Isabelle when putting her to nap. This was the ultimatum! I was furiously mad when I could not enter Isabelle's room. Either she is sleeping inside or she is doing something to my gal, and I am so not happy. Her reason for doing so "if not Isabelle will not sleep, she see me lock door, then she will sleep". What ridiculous excuse is that?!??!?!?!?!? And guess what, my dear observant Isabelle now wants to lock every room door she enters. I'm really afraid she may lock herself in one of the rooms one day!!!

2)She tears Isabelle clothes while squeezing them (that's what she told my mum)/ She tells me the clothes were already torn when she was washing them, it was not a result of squeezing. Whatever the case, the clothes are almost brand new from one of my shopping sprees from Osh Kosh and I am dead furious! This is in addition to the many things she has broken in our home, including a precious sculpture D bought for me from Norway. Arghgghghgh!

3) She shows her black face and temper when Isabelle is in a cranky mood during milk feeds. Hello??? I expect patience when you are dealing with a baby/toddler. What has the child done? SHe is not able to express herself, so forgive her please if she has annoyed you with her crankiness. Be patient with her and show her some love. Not tsk tsk. Maybe that;s why Isabelle feeds better when my mum or me take over, cos we continue to smile and talk to her patiently. Maybe that's why Isabelle isnt so clingy to her anymore of late.

4) She does not cook Isabelle's soup till boiling hot when there is vegetables added into it. And does not want to listen when my mum tells her to ensure the food is throughly cooked. Instead she crosses her arms and ignore my mum. One word... STUBBORN! Maybe cos I am a FTWM and have not been around all these time to correct her, so she thinks she is right! Whatever the case, she is seldom receptive to listening to others advice, unless you prove her wrong or show her all her faults.

To be fair, she was almost the perfect helper at the start. I learnt many things about handling a baby through her. SOme of her ways may not have gone down well with the old folks, but because we were open to trying out some of these....Isabelle was not afraid of water from a young age and was standing to bathe even before 6 months! To her credit, I was able to breastfeed for 1 year. I had to pump frequently to keep my supply up, and she took care of all the rest like bottle feeding the baby. Isabelle also had the habit of taking a super long time to finish her milk (close to 1 hr) and she patiently fed her, sometimes rocking her as well.

Sigh, but as Isabelle grew up, I'm not sure what triggered the change. She has lost interest of late. I think she misses her family. But I'm not to blame either, since she lied to me that her family was aware of her coming over. I would not have taken her if she did not have her family's blessings. ANd I was not aware that she ran away from home prior to coming here, that she was a smoker and on drugs and an alcoholic! Oh gosh...I hope I dont scare anyone with her background. I gave her a chance to change her life....but alas things are not working so well now. Maybe it's time we part now before things get worse. At least I can say thank you sincerely to her for helping me pull through the last 1 year.